Suitors
by Pressing Point
Summary: AU. The day Naruto Uzumaki fell in love would be the day he gave up ramen. Simply, it wasn't going to happen. Well, that's what he used to believe. Now that he's been strung into becoming a suitor for the Hyuuga heiress, he's been thinking otherwise.
1. Chapter 1

**Suitors**

**Prologue**

By definition, a suitor is a man who is trying to persuade a woman to marry him. This happens through courtship. What is courtship? That can be described as the period of a romantic relationship before marriage, the act of paying attention to somebody with a view to developing a more intimate relationship, or even friendly and often ingratiating attention for the purpose of winning a favor or establishing an alliance or other relationship.

Who am I? I'm Hinata Hyuuga, a girl who has a _different _view of suitors and the process of courtship. In my eyes:

1. Suitors are brainwashed men with their tighty whities strapped on too tight. They'd do "anything" for you just because: a. some fortune is involved b. you're hot c. they can easily manipulate you.

2. Courtship is a dumb method rich parents use to ensure that their kid marries someone to keep the wealth going. Yes. It's all about the money, not the child's happiness and definitely not about love.

3. Suitors minimize one's chances of finding _true _love and courtship is an organized cheap way of finding love, not true love.

Basically, suitors and courtship can(as Tenten put it) suck my left nut. I. DON'T. WANT. A. SUITOR. And if you don't understand that, let me say it for you in three other languages.

Eu não quero um pretendente.

No quiero un pretendiente.

Non voglio un corteggiatore.

But my father is apparently the deafest person alive.


	2. Chapter 2

**Suitors**

**Chapter 2**

Hyuugas weren't cowards. They were strong, independent and arrogant when needed. Cowardice wasn't a word to them. Especially not Hyuuga Hiashi. That was why paying a cold man to deliver the news to his daughter of her suitor arrangement was not a characteristic of cowardice but more like one of strategy and high intellectual talent…

Hiashi ran his fingers through his chocolate brown hair and wiped away the beads of sweat on his forehead with a manly hanky. Ok, that may have been a cowardly thing to do but he couldn't help it. If he went by himself, the same thing would happen for the 50th time. He just hoped this man he hired was as heartless as it said he was on his résumé.

The Hyuuga sighed at the memory of the other "unbreakable" people he hired. They all went home crying and cussing at him. Just why had his daughter decided to become so troublesome? Why couldn't she go back to being the submissive, gentle and quiet girl she was during her early years? She was so questioning and argumentative now. She didn't remain silent but voiced her opinion loudly and openly. What had possessed her to change so drastically he'd never know...

As Hiashi watched the clock hand tick, he smiled. It had been a full minute. Maybe this man truly was steel after al-.

The door to his study flew off its hinges and crashed through the far end window. In came an irate large man with tattoos on his overly huge biceps and scars all over the exposed skin where leather didn't cover. "HOW COULD YOU THINK OF EVER DOING THAT TO SUCH AN INNOCENT AND DEAR CREATURE OF THE LOVING ANGELS! YOU FUCKING SHIT!"

Hiashi sighed and rolled his eyes. He'd been here and done this over 40 times. He sipped his coffee. "Crusher, I hired you to simply tell my daught-."

Flexing his muscles and every vein on his face, Crusher used his extremely large hand to pick Hiashi up by the head, currently leaving the Hyuuga's feet dangling in the air. Hiashi sipped his coffee again, bored. This had happened before too. "YOU ARE A SICK, SICK MAN!"

"I've heard," Hiashi responded.

Crusher dropped him to the floor and wagged his finger in Hiashi's face. "IF YOU EVER, EVER, MAKE THAT SOFT GIFT OF NATURE DO ANY THING SHE DOESN'T WANT TO DO, I WILL PERSONALLY HAVE YOU RIPPED FROM LIMB TO LIMB!"

Hiashi narrowed his eyes. "Sounds nice…" He guessed he should add that one to the long list of death threats he'd gotten from the other people he hired… or maybe he already had that one on there...

Punching a brand new hole in the wall, Crusher took his leave through that hole, crying about his distressed creature.

Hiashi sighed and went back to his desk. From here he could tell his daughter was sitting on her bed, painting a new piece and smirking to herself at another victory.

_Hinata-99_

_Hiashi-0_

Hiashi reached for the Bingo book and flipped to the next page. He dialed the number listed and placed the phone to his ear. "Yeah, Hammer? Are you free tomorrow? I need you to deliver some news to my daughter…"


	3. Chapter 3

**(**A/N: I know you guys have been complaining about the short chapters, but I think I'm going to keep it this way. It'll be easier for me to write and it'll allow me to update quickly.**)**

**Suitors**

**Chapter 3**

He hadn't been doing anything in particular-just balancing a pencil on his nose as he sat in his empty office- but that didn't mean he wanted to be bothered. Today was the first day in weeks that his schedule wasn't filled to the brim with work and frankly, balancing pencils on his nose had become one of his many forms of leisure.

Naruto let the stationery roll off his face and into his hand. "So let me get this straight," he began, continuing to stare at the ceiling. "Itachi persuaded you to become a suitor for some heiress _months _ago and you _just _remembered about it _today_, a week from the day you actually have to _meet _this woman."

"Hn," Sasuke replied.

The blond rolled his azure eyes at the lackluster response. "And now you want _me _to take your place and take her out _for _you."

"Exactly."

"You really are batshit crazy."

Naruto could tell the brooding Uchiha was upset but he honestly didn't care. He was tired and overworked. The only thing he wanted to do for the remainder of the week was sleep. He couldn't even explain why he came to work this morning other than his stubborn work habit. Co-owning an entire corporation sucked the life out of him.

"Naruto."

If Naruto's ears weren't deceiving him, he was almost certain he could hear the subtlest form of _pleading _in the normally stone-hearted Uchiha's voice. "No."

Sasuke attempted to glare him into submission. "Why not?" he asked, exasperated.

Naruto sighed and lightly spun around in his large office chair. "Because," he simply stated.

Sasuke grounded his teeth, feeling his patience grow thin. "Because _what_?"

Naruto stopped spinning around in his chair and met his friend's dark eyes. "_Because_," he stated again. "I've been covering you for the last 3weeks and I'm tired _as_ shit and _of_ your shit. _You_ handle it."

Sasuke grimaced. "I told you, I've been busy."

Naruto took to spinning again. "Then I'm sure you can afford to be busy for one more day and go out on your own date."

Sasuke placed his head in his hands and ran his fingers through his hair. The Uchiha sighed.

Not used to seeing the mini-mogul so disgruntled, Naruto slowed his spinning and eyed his friend warily. "Why don't you just cancel?" he suggested.

"Because I can't," Sasuke replied. "You know how Itachi talked about us wanting to secure our ties with the Hyuuga Corps.? This is supposed to be it."

Naruto raised an eyebrow. "I never knew the woman was a Hyuuga," he murmured. Still maintaining his resistance, he went on to say, "I know the Hyuuga are extremely successful and have been around for ages but is selling yourself to their heir _really _worth a business tie? And isn't that family made of stuck-up prude bitches?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "It's not _just _a tie. It'll eventually lead to the merging of their company with ours-therefore, eliminating all of our _real _competition. This would be the best move for us."

Naruto pursed his lips. Earlier in time, Konoha had 3 major architecture firms. Now, the number had been reduced to two since Sasuke and Naruto had decided to merge their family companies into one. If they were able to get the Hyuuga to merge as well, who knew how big they could get. The Hyuuga had an even longer history in Konoha than the Uchiha did. Their business experience was not only impeccable, but also unmatched. To get rid of them as the ultimate competition would be a miracle.

"Still, no." Naruto said as he slumped into his chair.

"It's only one date," Sasuke pleaded. "Just do this for me _one _night next week and I'll have all future arrangements under control, ok?"

Naruto eyed the Uchiha for any sign of falsehood. After a long pause, he opened his mouth to speak. "Just _one _night, alright? No funny business."


	4. Chapter 4

**Suitors**

**Chapter 4**

Hiashi was completely disheveled but happy. His chocolate brown hair was frizzy and his expensive robes had holes in them, but he grinned madly as he sat himself at his desk. You know what? He felt _more_ than happy. He felt _ecstatic_. Why? He was finally able to deal the news to his daughter about her suitor arrangement and came out of it _alive_.

He quickly reached for the phone on his desk and dialed the number of the first suitor's abode.

It wasn't easy giving his daughter the news, but it was necessary. He didn't want to be the one to do it, but considering how well his luck was going with all the supposedly unshakable people he hired, he had to. He had made two mistakes when he went to see Hinata. The first was not remembering that Hammer was still in the room with his daughter. That led to Hiashi having to dodge fatal injury as Hammer kept jabbing at him with pencils and pens. The second was not preparing himself for Hinata's emotional intimidation. She went from calling him 'Daddy', to pouting oh-so-adorably, to full-blown tears. Had he not been so motivated to succeed by his previous failed attempts, he would have succumbed to his daughter's mind games.

As soon as he declared his proposition with some base of authority in his voice, Hinata's innocent charade wore off. She had glared at him with extreme contempt, as if she would murder him in her own due time. Gruffly, she had muttered a small "Fine.", and proceeded to throw a paintbrush at him, aiming to gouge his eye out but only succeeding to create a hole in his favorite robe.

"Good morning, this is the Hyuuga Head," Hiashi said as soon as the call connected. That line was repeated several times in the next fifteen minutes as Hiashi consequently dialed the numbers of the thirty suitors he had hand-picked in order to remind each suitor of his designated day and time.

After hanging up the phone for the last time, Hiashi eased into his chair and smiled.

_Hinata-99_

_Hiashi-1_


End file.
